As I was talking with God today, He reminded me to count my blessings. What a good idea. There are far too many to list here, but I thought I'd share some with ya'll.
1. A God that loves me and is faithful to me. He carries me through trials. He is true, good and pure.
2. A delightful family - both immediate and extended.
3. Friends - in real life, across the miles and many that I've only met via computer - that have loved, encouraged and supported me through so much.
4. Health. I'm so very thankful that Eliana hasn't gotten sick!!! Even when our family went through 2 bouts of illness this year she remained healthy. I hope this trend will continue!
5. A clean house. I don't know about you, but it doesn't happen often enough over here. Seems like if I can get one room clean, there is a big mess being made in another one - or several other ones. This week some friends paid for a cleaning service to clean our home - top to bottom. It was wonderful. The gals did a super job! It was a very thoughtful and much appreciated gift!
6. Meals - We continue to receive meals from friends. What a blessing to have this provided for us. So much of my time is spent trying to feed and care for Eliana and it's nice not to have to deal with food planning and prep.
7. Laughter - Eliana sweet laugh is a treat. Just yesterday a friend called after reading my last blog entry to encourage me. She prayed with me and one of the things she prayed was that Eliana would laugh again. Last night when my family was gone, Eliana and I went for a walk. I carried her in my arms and talked with her. At one point she started to laugh. What a precious sound to my ears - and what a sweet answer to prayer!
8. Prayers - We have had so many prayers lifted for us and so many answered. How could I be anything but thankful! Tonight Eliana pulled out her tube ... again. Actually this one has been in since Monday which is pretty long for her! When it was time to put the tube back in, it was midnight. My 14yo was up, the other children asleep and my dh still at work. As I was getting ready a bottle, I heard Eliana scream. Not a scream I've heard before and it scared me.
We arent sure what upset her, but she was upset! I tried to calm her and had a hard time doing so. Anyway, I tried to get her settled and she really struggled getting settled down.
She still wasn't real settled and was pretty unhappy, but I thought I could get it in quickly and just have it over and done with. Maybe a bad idea. As I was putting in the tube, she really started crying, then gagging. Then making choking sounds and I didn't have it all the way in. I begin to wonder if I've put it in the wrong way (hasn't happened before) so I yank the tube out.
Eliana then seems to be choking still. She was making odd noises like there was fluid or something choking her. Several times I thought she was going to throw up, but she didn't. I tried to suction her - nothing. The sounds she was making just scared me. Sometimes it is just frightening to be a parent - especially when you wonder if you know what you are doing. She just kept choking, seeming like it was difficult to swallow and it was just scary!
She finally fell asleep and I just held her for awhile. After Roger got home, I tried again. (Placement #22 - yes, I'm still counting!) This time with success! She cried, and even gagged, but it went! Oh, here's a funny. Once I had gotten her tube in, checked placement, taped it down to her face and just thoroughly upset her - Christopher looked at me and said "Happy Mother's Day".
Happy Mother's Day indeed. I'm one very blessed and very thankful mama!!!
Love to you all,
Leslie
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I know you've heard it before, but you are such an inspiration to so many. I don't comment much on the board, but wanted you to know how your patience, love for your children, and passion for the Lord has truly touched me. Hope you have a wonderful, restful Mother's Day.
ReplyDeleteYou are a blessing to your children and to so many more--especially to me!
ReplyDeleteAwww, Leslie!! I came over to your blog to wish you a Happy Mother's Day! My vote is for YOU to win mother of the year! :) Your little Eliana laughing made me tear up. I am just so thankful that you got to enjoy that special moment with your daughter. I pray you know how cherished and loved YOU are today!
ReplyDeleteLeslie,
ReplyDeleteWhen Justin had an NG tube, it seemed like he was always somewhat congested. And I could never suction out his nose very well with a tube in it. After his catherization, his breathing was really raspy and he would make choking sounds. They said it wasn't unusual after intubation for the first 24 hrs. The nurse fixed his bed with his head higher, like you have Eliana's, and placed a rolled blanket under his neck, so his head tilted back a bit with his chin up to give his airway more room. It seemed to help a little, but except for brief interludes when we got him arranged just right and he slept quietly for a time, the raspy breathing and choking sounds continued. By the 3rd day post cath, a patient care aide asked me, "Does he have a cold?" I said, "Well no one has even suggested that, but it does seem that he might!" Later that day, I was finishing his feeding with the NG tube (gravity feed, which is faster than a feeding pump), and he began choking and vomiting up his milk. I quickly turned him on his side, and out came a hunk of mucus with the milk. After that he sounded much better, though it his cold continued to run its course.
There have been other times, since, when he has a cold, that the only way he can sleep is in a swing. I suppose he sounds worse than any of the other children because of a floppier airway. And low muscle tone makes it harder for him to cough up mucus. In fact, he doesn't cough it up. I've had plenty of sinus trouble and have experienced times when something is so thick and it won't go up or down and makes me gag till I feel like I'm going to throw up. It has happened to my 6 year old, and it really scared her. So, I imagine that post nasal drip can be some what traumatic for our little ones.
Since we've had Justin on supplements to boost his immune system, he almost never gets a cold. When he does, it is uncomplicated by respiratory issues and short in duration. Praise the Lord!
You continue to be daily in my thoughts and prayers. Your 6 children are blessed to have you for their mother. You would give up your life to save any one of them. Truly you are giving them your life because you are giving them all you've got... all your time, all your love, all your energy, all your concern, worry, tears, prayers, all your best (and sometimes worst)! Not to leave out your dh... you're giving him your all, as well. But today is Mother's Day! Hope yours has been very blessed, in spite of its rough beginning!
Love,
Anna