Friday, August 17, 2007

"Our House is Yucky"

Or so says my 3yo.  He doesn't really think it's yucky.  His motives were clear to me soon after his next words came out - "I go to Catherine's house".  Hmmm ... is that all it takes to visit a friend?  Thinking that your own home is yucky?  LOL  Sometimes I just love the simplicity of a child's mind.  The ability to ask for what you want or need - albeit in a round about way.  This child of mine is such a funny little fellow and his way of thinking just tickles me at times.  I love his laugh and wide grin.  He does bring joy to my days.

I've tried to explain to him that our friends are moving as I don't want it to come as a complete surprise.  I don't think he understands though he responds to me that he does.  To be honest, I really don't understand either.

"For My thoughts are not your thoughts, Nor are your ways My ways," declares the LORD.

Isaiah 55:8

Just yesterday Catherine's youngest daughter said to me "Do you know we are moving in six days?"  Oh yes sweet child.  I know.  I know it far too well and think of it much too often.  We are trying to move about out days filling them with projects and fun - and still getting done the final things that must be done.  At times we can be practical, but as the pictures come down and things get put away the starkness is a sign of all that is yet to come.  It's depressing.

A sweet friend noting my sadness over this move asked what I'd be like when it was time for my children to move out.  I can't bear to think of it.  I know it is coming too - and far too soon for my liking.  I tear up just thinking of that day.  I love being with my family and having them all around me.  So I try not to think of it often - but often enough to remind me of what I want to be doing with my days so that I won't have regrets.  Often enough to remind me to choose the important things and not fret (so much) over the things that really don't matter.  (I still have work to do on this!)

That is a little unrealistic - wanting to have no regrets - because of course there will be regrets, but hopefully not too many.  That's a voice that I'm hearing now - the whispers of times when I should have done something differently or when I have not been the friend that I should have been.  What a sweet blessing though to know that she knows my heart.  She knows me.  It's a very safe friendship.  I'm sure that there were times I took for granted the time that we had and the convenience of being so close.  Isn't that often the way that it is though?  I know that I can't expect not to make mistakes.  My heart is just so very tender now - and has been for quite a long time now.  I keep trying to focus on God's voice as the whispers that aren't from Him can really be a burden - and a source of further pain.   

Oh, I need to focus on some happier thoughts.  Catherine and I have been working on making planners for the year.  This is a new project for us and it is a combination of the FIAR planner and personalized forms.  (Catherine is a whiz at making beautiful forms!).  She has finished hers and hopefully mine will be done and ready to use by tomorrow.  This is one of  many projects we have worked on together.  I'm not going to say it is the last either as I know we can still work on things long distance.  It will be the last one that we have the luxury of just running back and forth to each other's houses with pages, ideas, and requests for help though.

A big PRAISE update on Eliana.  She had her physical therapy on Wednesday.  This is usually a fun appointment as I am encouraged by what she can do and not overwhelmed with what she can't do.  An attitude I'm sure to have lots of time to practice and learn. 

Eliana's latest thing is to get up on her hands and knees  - and rock!  She is so cute and looks like she is ready to go somewhere.  When her therapist noted the things she was able to do and marked them on a graph she had really shot up.  This graph shows typical developement for a child.  Eliana has never been on the curve - but now she is on it!!!  Happy tears filled my eyes as she shared this.  She is between the 10th and 25th%.  This is still "behind" a typically developing child, but given all that she has been through, I think it's pretty amazing!  Way to go little girl!

Eating continues to be going well.  She is eating from the bottle each time it is offered.  She hasn't refused it now for over 2 weeks.  Yippee!!!  Today she has had 3 feedings and is already up to 8.5 ounces.  This is great for her!  One more good feeding will have her reaching a new high for eating.  I appreciate your continued prayers for her feeding.

Need to run finish dinner.  We've started the main dish as a school project for my younger boys.  (It's the Amber on the Mountain meal for you rowers.)  Catherine is working on the side and hopefully we can muster up the energy to make some cookies to go along with it. 

More later as I'm working on a project and would love some help.

With love,